IMPACTING LIVES

W hen it comes to sex, most married Christians just do what works for them. If they have been blessed enough to have discovered something that brings satisfaction, pleasure, closeness, and climax, they most likely will continue that practice. However, some are plagued with guilt because they wonder if what they're doing is sinful. TCW receives many, many questions from Christian couples who want to know what is and what is not okay to do sexually. Unfortunately, churches tend to ignore this issue, small groups usually don't talk about sex, and most Christian books deal with more "spiritual" ideas. Wouldn't it be nice to have a list of sexual practices categorized by "sinful" or "okay"? Is there such a list? Would everyone agree with the list? Is there a solution to this dilemma? We think the answers to those questions are: yes, no, no, and probably not—in that order. We'd really like to create such a list that could settle once and ...

To figure out what to do about a sexless marriage, start by seeking the causes. As Sam Louie points out in his PT blogpost  I’m in a Sexless  Marriage , a  sexless marriage is a vulnerable marriage.   Sex promotes the flow of  oxytocin , the chemical that promotes feelings of bonding. Sex also is a free way of having fun together. Lastly, when sex is a special activity that married couples share only with each other, sexual sharing enhances the partnership, keeping it monogomous, loving and strong. So what can a couple, or even just one partner, do when sex has disappeared and a sexless marriage has become their new normal? A good place to start is by checking out what has caused the decrease in sharing this generally pleasurable activity. Here's some of the most common factors that inhibit sexual sharing: 1. No private time together. If spouses prioritize other activities over sharing sexual time, there may be trouble ahead. Sometimes there i...

1. Eagles Have Vision If you ever happen to see an eagle sitting high above the tree or cliff of a stiff mountain, watch closely and see how attentive the bird is. The body sits still and the head will be tilted side to side to observed what is happening below, around and above it. Even if its flying close by, you can observe how keen its eyes are looking for its prey. Eagles have a keen vision. Their eyes are specially designed for long distance focus and clarity. They can spot another eagle soaring from 50 miles away. Does this characteristic ring a bell in your mind? I am sure it does. Look at great leaders of this world who have come and gone. There are many great leaders that came and went but one characteristic that is common in all is "Vision". Vision is a successful leadership characteristic Take Abraham Lincoln for example. Abraham Lincoln, the 16th president of the United States, guided his country through the most devastating experience in its national h...

In Johannesburg, a young boy walks in front of a tribute mural to Nelson Mandela. Mandela embodied all of the characteristics of a servant leader. From greedy executives to despotic rulers, we’ve all seen examples of poor leadership. But we’ve also seen the examples of Nelson Mandela and Martin Luther King Jr. — servant leaders who were able to accomplish great things by putting people first. To help YALI Network members on their paths toward servant leadership, we’ve curated a list of characteristics that define servant leaders based on Robert K. Greenleaf’s seminal essay. It’s not exhaustive, but it’s a start! 1. Listens actively:  A servant leader’s first response to any problem is to listen. She seeks to identify the will of the group and helps clarify that will by listening. When she listens, she does so intently. She does not multitask or interrupt, but truly strives to understand the speaker. 2. Prioritizes:  Can you separate the important from the unimport...

As a Christian, the most important aspect of my life is my relationship with God.  My life is all about Jesus. He is my identity, my passion. When Debbie and I read and discuss the Word together, we are sharing the most important facet of our lives.  We are connecting in a profound, powerful way. We are moving together toward the same horizon – experiencing the presence of God together in our life and marriage. This promotes spiritual oneness, communion with God and unity with each other. When you participate in a weekly Bible study with a group of men or ladies where everyone is studying the same passages and each person discusses what God has personally shown them and how it has impacted their lives, a deep bond develops.  You become concerned about what is going on in the lives of all of the other people in the group.  Your care and love for each person in the group increases.  Your desire to pray for each participant grows.  When you have a bible st...

When I minister in churches, couples often ask, “How can I raise Godly children”?  I sense these parents are longing for me to give them a formula in which to input their offspring so that children who love and respect the Lord will pop out. However, as most seasoned parents understand, this cannot be reduced to a formula, but requires a great amount of wisdom gleaned from biblical principles. Therefore, please understand these ten keys are not meant to be an all inclusive parenting manual, but rather major biblical points of consideration that God has shown Debbie and me over the last thirty years as we raised our four sons. We readily admit that we made mistakes along the way, but our God was gracious to confirm what we did right and to gently teach us through our mistakes. Hopefully you can benefit from all He has shown us. 1)     Develop a Passionate Relationship with God In Deuteronomy 6:5-6, God instructs parents: You shall love the Lord your God w...